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Want A Threesome? How To Bring It Up Without Getting Smacked!

Any good porno worth its weight in… well, you know... features a threesome. This long sought after two-on-one scenario has rocked the world of many a guy for far too long. It is almost the holy grail of sex: To achieve the threesome means sexual greatness. I would venture to say that it is on 99% of all guys' bucket lists, just an educated guess.  So how do you bring it up to your girl without getting smacked?

Feel Her Out

Threesomes have become fairly ubiquitous in common conversation and popular entertainment.  Magazine articles and movies present the perfect opportunity for you to feel out her thoughts on the topic.  If a threesome conversation comes up in a movie, lean over ask her if she would ever think about doing that.  If you run across an article in a magazine that mentions it, just keep it casual and say “what do you think about that?” By keeping it general and not bringing it up in a way that makes her feel pressured, you will get a better idea of her attitude towards threesomes.  Her response should dictate how deeply you delve into the topic (back off if you feel the icy glare boring a hole through you as her anger rises).

Timing is Everything

Timing can be everything when it comes to maximizing the threesome opportunity. If your girl has previously indicated that bringing another girl into your bedroom is not outside the realm of possibility, you might want to wait until your girl is comfortable enough to bring it up.  It is crucial that she feels like she has some control over the situation, such as when it will happen and with whom. It is perfectly fine to talk about inviting a third into your bedroom before heading out for the evening.  It is great if you can agree beforehand and approach candidates as a team.  However, dudes, let your girl make the final decision on who she wants to join the party.   Don’t pressure her to make a decision or be pushy and make the threesome your single-minded mission for the entire night. This will likely make your girl jealous by making her feel like she is not enough for you on any given night or that the threesome is less about mutual pleasure and more about you getting some strange.

It’s Not All About You

Your girl does not want to feel she is being pressured into it to fulfill your selfish sexual fantasy. She wants to know that it is as much about you wanting her to enjoy a pleasurable experience as it is for yourself.  You can reassure her by telling her how you much you want her to have an amazing time and how you just want her to get off. Tell her how turned on it will make you to watch her enjoying herself. Make sure that she is the main character in this scene.  By making her feel comfortable and letting her know that you are really wanting her to enjoy herself, it will reap big rewards for you as well. She in turn will feel more confident and secure in really letting loose and losing herself in the situation and that means hotter action for you to watch and participate in as well. It’s also important to reassure her that regardless of who else might be joining the two of you, regardless of whether it is a one time thing or an ongoing arrangement, that it is still just the two of you. You don't want a relationship with anyone but her. The other girl is just there for the two of you to enjoy together, and then she is going home.  It’s your lady, and only her, that you want. A threesome can be an exciting way for you and your girl to explore new sexual territory together and enjoy seeing each other get pleasure in a new way.  It can be a positive experience that can strengthen your relationship, but it also has to be something that you are both in agreement on and not a situation where one of your are being pressured into it. That will only lead to jealousy and resentment, which is the exact opposite of what the threesome fantasy is all about. So communicate openly, choose wisely, and enjoy yourselves!

About the author

Lisa, aka Random Girl, is a mild-mannered professional by day, wickedly clever blogger/sex goddess/smartass by night. Lisa has very little internal filtering and is the voice behind Random Girl Blogs. She also makes fantastic chocolate chip cookies.

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19 responses to “Want A Threesome? How To Bring It Up Without Getting Smacked!”

  1. LickIt says:

    Great Article! I usually judge my possibility of, having a threesome with a woman by their actions. If she drinks jager and loves strip clubs your chances are improved greatly.

    • Sounds like you have some experience with this scenario LickIt. Thanks for the tips. I am sure that jager and strip clubs probably would give you a pretty good indication of a likely candidate!

  2. Tony Van Helsing says:

    Good article, suprised you didn't mention a threesome with 2 males and a female. My wife and I have discussed this but she said she wouldn't be able to get over the jealousy of seeing me with another woman. Not that I'm saying I'm irresistable or anything.

    • Thanks for the comment Tony. Yes the MMF scenario is also an option just a bit more logistically challenging. Anytime there is more than the two of you, communication is essential so you are both comfortable with the situation and no one is feeling pressured into a scenario that may do more harm than good to your relationship, And I'm sure you wife has very good reason to be jealous, love…

  3. Brandi says:

    Ah the threesome! That ellusive little bastard that it is. I have wanted to participate in one for years, but my ex was a jealous man and since divorce I havent found someone I am comfotable enough with to go there…*sigh* I would imagine that more girls have fantasies about it than guys think (not just 2 males fantasy.)

    Great article Randy dear! As allways ever informative…You really are keeping the males out of the doghouse one article at a time :)

    • Brandi, I agree that women probably fantasize about this scenario much more often than most guys would ever imagine. I know I do. Hope you get your chance to live it out soon darling! I like that "keeping males out of the doghouse one article at a time" line. That's what I'm trying to do. Can I get a cape or cool costume or something for that??

  4. @katsidhe says:

    I think that I'm far too narcissistic to participate in a threesome. I like attention way too much to be willing to share it.
    Another excellent article, love.~ It was very practical advice for someone who wants to attempt the subject without looking like an immature asshole.

  5. Jewels says:

    Great advice and I'm sure men out there reading that are taking notes. Another home run, sweets. Wonderful article.

    I have just recently met somebody who I feel comfortable enough bringing up this topic with. Don't get me wrong-I've been asked before but always turned it down because it was drunk, spur of the moment, and usually a VERY close friend asking me to be with her and her husband or fiance–NOT a realm I'm willing to venture into.

    The point being I think a lot more women out there are open to a FFM or MMF threesome then men think…but it has to be the right man who gets a woman to admit that and be comfortable with it. Lots of things have to line up for the situation to be right–at least for me.

    • I agree details count in this situation, like random people vs. close friends and how the dynamic would be different MMF vs. FFM. It all has to be taken into consideration and everyone involved needs to be on the same page before it goes down to make sure it isn't a disaster for one or all of you

  6. Sugar Free says:

    Another great article, darling!! I've had a threesome before, but man is it a lot of work. Safety first, you know!

  7. john says:

    My wife loves going to strip clubs. everytime we go she tak es her panties off and a stripper goes down on her. I mean she has an orgasim. But she won’t take it the bedroom. Strippers have given their numbers to her begging her to call them. But she won’t take the plunge. I know she’s bi courious. Very bi courious. How do I convince her?

  8. Guest says:

    this article has really helped! thank you! but now its just finding the right time and place to not only ask but communicate about it, does that make since? I mean i've been thinking about it for quite awhile, i'm not sure how bring it up. but here's the real jig: she asked me last june, i said no, but now its like….. why not go for it? but i don't want to make it all about me. so how do ask, after ive turned her down on the offer already once?

  9. henry says:

    How can l talk to my wife about a threesome she was going to once but the woman she wanted did not how can i get her to look at other women please help

  10. Mike says:

    So there is this Girl whom i have know for a long time. cutting right to the chase how do you know if a girl is hinting towards a FFM that it isnt just a test…. Of course i would like any other guy love a threesome, but we just started dating and i dont wanna risk losing chances with her for a one time fantasy

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